Honestly, fear


Just Breathe…. by Kushita on deviantART

How we self-sabotage our own selves.

I’ve always been afraid. I don’t know why. I think it’s gotten worse though, over the years. Might need to do a Timeline therapy for this. Find out the cause of my fear, make my peace with it, and let it go.

The fear, this leaden feeling
It sits in a corner of my chest.
Just under my left breast
A heavy, leaden thing.

When I close my eyes
And acknowledge my fear exists
I find myself standing still, sitting still
Nothing moves.

There is no fear, in the traditional sense
No panic, no increased heartbeat, no desire to run
Instead, what there is
Is resigned acceptance that things change for the worse.

It’s a horrible thing, this fear.
Not the kind that makes you scream, cry, shout in horror
No, this fear is infinitely more terrifying
Simply because it is calming.

Fear to keep you where you are
To protect yourself from disappointment
Freezing yourself in that one moment
To keep the self from harm.

I acknowledge this fear.
I acknowledge it exists.
I know the reason for its presence.
And choose to move forward, with its warning.

Fear is the mind-killer
It is also the protector
Minimising risk and increasing survival rate
Fear was once necessary.

You need love to live
But fear to survive
Without one, the other cannot be.

[Poem] Time Leaves A Scar

Time leaves a scar
Memories of a passing mortality
Skins wrinkle, senses fade
We disappear into nothingness

Sentience is but a curse
Life is but a dream
This reality is all we have
So realities we have to make.

A step forward
A hesitant move
Time presses on
Invisible but for its presence.

We strive
Only to survive
Yet in that simple act
We ensure immortality.

Some win immortality through words
Some win immortality through deeds
Some are proof of immortality
Fruits of a mixed gene.

Time leaves a scar
Traces of a fragile immortality
Our actions shape everything
A butterfly may cause a storm.

[Poetry] Prophecy Draft

Autumn Winter
Summer December
A stray glance
A misplaced trust
Gone was light
Innocence lost

But for a kiss to be slain
But for a night, to be destroyed.

Forbidden, forbidden
Ah how sweet the fruit
Even sweeter still
The corruption of souls.

~~~~~

A fleeting stray
A gentle glance
A soft heart
Innocence relapse.

Fear and love
Leash and free
The same mistakes,
The same longing.

Different beds in a night
Lovers many but hearts a few
Reap, reap weep and rend
Thus begins the Baron’s revenge.

- The Downfall of the Vermillion Isles
Written by an unknown poet

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Poetry On Facebook

So in recent days, people have been posting random bits of poetry here and there. It’s on a meme that I enjoy reading. Here’s the one I’ve done today. Will post the other that Karcy assigned me in a bit: Continue reading

[Poem] Paper Ink

Paper ink
Paper pen
Paper write without end

Paper ink
paper pen
Paper my heart will you rend

Paper ink
Paper Pen
Where will my words you send?

Paper ink
Paper pen
Paper paper my skills to mend.

Paper ink
Paper bend
Ok, find, words
Paper paper my writing to be banned?

[Poetry] Break

Since it seems to be the American Month of Poetry, thought I’d write something. Have never tried this style before. Yes, deliberate miscaps are deliberate. :D Oh yeah, poem was written to the tune of Psycho Pass’ Namai No Nai Kibutsu: http://vimeo.com/59940316

Title: Break.

bREAK.
BRat.
DarkNEss
l0neliness
Despair

Running running running
Against a foe you cannot see
Desperation, the fight to stay alive
A panicked shot, a cornered victim

Scream.
Shout.
Hoarse your throat. A sinister smile in the darkness.

Falling
Blessed, sweet, darkness

Reaching out to the sunlight
I looked up to see the dawn
Then i turned
Without regret
With my own two feet
Walk back into the darkness.

wITH a sMilE aS twIstED AS mY hArT.

Valentine’s Day 2013

You were there when I was at my weakest.
You saw me through tears.
You carried me gently through endless nights.
Though I’ve cheated on you, you’ve always taken me back.
You never complain when you have to share.
Your rough and warm surface never fails to support me.
Even after all these years, you’ve retained your bounce.

This Valentine’s, make love, not war… to your bed. :P

Sleepy Heffalump
Credit: Sleepy Heffalump by Neil T, on Flickr

[Poem] Summer’s Tears

Found this while cleaning my room. Wrote this during a breakup years ago:

The summer rains are here
The summer sun set to sear
A woman’s face smiles
Her heart hidden beneath files

The secrets that she kept
The tears that she wept
Releasing a bird never felt more painful
Neither did suicide so beautiful

Too many friend she has
To some her soul laid bare
Yet the only one she wants
Is the only one who is a friend

How do you go back
And become just friends?
What medicine could you take,
To firmly accept a love’s end?

Pain beyond measure
Nagging without censure
Her parents don’t care
She knows no trust there

A book, a tool, an instrument
Things tangible on this firmanent
They’ve seen the depths of her pain
To see a happy soul now slain

A lone spirit, set adrift
The heaviness she cannot lift
Her tears will not fall here
Not when behind grandma slumbers

Cry when you’re alone
When loneliness cuts to the bone
Keep close to you your phone
In case he calls, and hears your voice.