The thing about habits and rituals is that they are short cuts. Programme your mind and body to carry out certain rituals and once they become habits, they are fairly effortless. I say fairly because sometimes there are days when you would not want to indulge in them, but in a lot of cases, it takes just a little prompting more than usual to do so.
And it takes time to do so. Time and effort. So before you embark on a new habit, the question you need to ask yourself is, “How much do I want this habit?” which is then followed by “Do I want this badly enough for the rest of my life?”
A lot of my habits are “eh, why not, there seems to be no harm in doing them” which ends up failing quite… spectacularly, if they take off at all. I am still trying to work out a fitness habit. For now, there are too many outside factors I can’t control affecting my activity choice, so I’ll need to go back to the drawing board and decide what exercise I want to try next.
The writing habit is one of those that start off well, but then slowly becomes forgotten. This is definitely more of me than it is of anyone else; writing is a form of therapy for me as well, and sometimes I stop writing because there are things I’d rather not confront.
Which is kinda silly if you think about it, but also very true. Writing what terrifies me, what my failings are, how I fail, and even how successful my plans turn out to be makes me feel terrible at times. If I fail, it’s because I fail as a human being. If I am successful, I am humblebragging… yes, even to myself.
I tell you la, cannot win this kind one.
It’s Jan 21 now, and I’ve managed to stick with at least jotting down a few notes everyday. It may not be the full 30 minutes or three pages people say you should write, but for now, it is enough.
I need to learn to celebrate the small victories that are mine again, instead of only focusing on the large ones where I disappear into the background.
How’s your morning going?